Imagine a smart phone app that allowed you to pay money to switch places with an alternate version of yourself in an alternate reality. Maybe there was an attractive male or female out there that you saw get on a train, but you couldn’t catch up to him or her because the door closed in your face. Well, with this app, you could pay money to switch places with another version of you, preferably one who was at the station a little earlier and made it on the train. Now, take a look at this comic called, Infinite Vacation.
This is a story of a guy named, Mark (Mark Prime). To be honest, he’s not that interesting of a person, but that’s why this story works for him. You see, this particular Mark doesn’t seem to be able to find satisfaction in anything. Who knows how long he’s been trading places with other Marks in other dimensions, but it’s safe to say that he’s been at it for quite awhile before we’ve gotten the chance to crack the book open. This is one of those books where the main character talks to the reader through narration, which I personally think is great. I feel like it’s been too long since I’ve read a comic like that… But that could be my own fault… Lately, my comic tastes have been all over the place, and before anyone says anything, Spider-Man’s self commentary doesn’t count. I’m pretty sure that when his narration boxes are filling the reader in, he’s really just talking to himself. Because honestly, if Spider-Man didn’t talk, he’d be kind of creepy, and I think that as a character, he knows this. But I’m off topic here.
After a brief explanation as to what the rules are for this comic’s universe, we’re given a peek at what the commercial for this awesome dimension-hopping application is like. Using a real guy, instead of a drawing, completely throws you off from what you thought the established tone was. This isn’t a bad thing. What I can make of it, writer Nick Spenser (Morning Glories, Shuddertown), is letting us know that we should expect the unexpected. After all, this is a book about buying your way into alternate realities. So anyway, Mark travels from life to life, never satisfied with any of them, save for one. And in this case, Mark-Prime meets a Mark who dropped out of college and started up a Surf Shop in Fiji. Surf-Mark never got into the Infinite Vacation, so Mark-Prime would just visit from time to time. Then Surf-Mark was killed. Which happens. Every person who uses the Vacation app happens to have a Google RSS Feed that lets a person know about all the alternate reality deaths of that person. But in the case of Surfer-Mark, things just didn’t seem right. Take that mystery and add a pretty girl to the equation, and we’ve got ourselves a story.
So what’s my overall take on this? I don’t know. I mean, I know I like it. But that’s about it. I’m satisfied. And that isn’t something that you can get out of a lot of comics these days. I have high hopes for Nick Spencer’s career and I definitely think that he’s apart of the good wave of “new” writers in comics. And hey, Christian Ward’s (Olympus) art is nothing to scoff at. The man has style. It’s like he’s using markers and paint at the same time, and it comes out solid. Every. Single. Time. This Spencer/Ward combo is a very good thing. So if we have any copies left in the store, be sure to grab it. After all, issue #1 is sold out through our distributor… But no worries, it’s going into a 2nd Printing, so if we happened to be sold out, you’ll have a second chance to read it on Feb. 16th. And that’s it folks. See ya next time.
This week almost every comic website was flooded with news that Wizard Magazine, along with its little brother Twisted Toyfare Theatre, were being cancelled immediately. No final issue, no grand farewell. Both publications will simply cease to exist. I hate to sound too cynical, but this news comes as little surprise to any dedicated comics fan. In fact, the only surprising thing is that Wizard Magazine has lasted all the way to 2011.
It’s funny then that I still feel sad that Wizard is ending, even though I haven’t read the publication in at least 15 years. Maybe it’s just the fact that Wizard has become somewhat of an institution. Wizard Magazine had been on the racks since July 1991. After nearly 20 years, it was comforting to think Wizard would always be on the shelf. Maybe one day while lazily shopping at the supermarket I could pick up the current Wizard and read through columns like “casting call” and relive the comic experience of 1991.
[Wizard's hard-hitting news coverage...]
Unfortunately, my exact sentiment is what killed the magazine. I’m sure a ton of Wizard readers from the 90s might have fond nostalgia for the publication, but by 2011 that’s all the magazine was good for. If you want up-to-date comic news, just go online. That’s the only real way to stay informed with an industry like comics that have weekly releases all year round.
[Casting Calls was always fun. They called it with Patrick Stewart as Professor X]
To be honest, looking back at Wizard’s history, I was never really that fond of it in the first place. Early on the magazine was a huge supporter of companies like Valiant Comics, which, from my adult perspective, seems like absolute garbage. Still, this is newsworthy none-the-less because it’s just another example of comic-related print publication meeting its demise in the new digital age. Yes, another one bites the dust… but let’s hope this isn’t opening up the flood gates.
Not a large haul this week. I guess all the other publishers decided to get out of Marvel’s way, what with the death of a foundational character dominating the market (*crickets chirping*). And that was totally worthwhile, absolutely riveting stuff that does not feel at all contrived (*tumbleweed bounces by*).
Et tu, Ron Burgundy?
[TENTACLE PORN, ALWAYS POPULAR]
Hey, Conan The Road of Kings 2 — good to see ya. Roy Thomas is two issues deep in this storyline, and he’s established a pace that is positively warp-drive compared to that of his predecessor. That sounds negative, because I really did enjoy Tim Truman’s time on the title … but last issue ends with Conan and Olivia on the shores of the Vilayet Sea, and this one opens with them in Shadizar the Wicked and no attempt is made to explain how they traversed that distance or what happened along the way. That’s a good thing; Truman’s final two years on the book often felt like he was trying to fill every nook and cranny in Conan’s life, to the detriment of the story at hand. This particular story is one of thievery (what else does one do in Shadizar?), a little light lovemaking (again, “when in Shadizar …”) and a late-night swim through an ocean of gold pieces (umm, that’s more Scrooge McDuck After Dark than Shadizar, but I’ll allow it). Story-wise, I’m enjoying Roy Thomas’ return to Conan. Art-wise, Mike Hawthorne is beginning to bug me.
[FEW PEOPLE KNOW THAT LURCH WAS CONAN ’S STUNT DOUBLE]
This is wholly subjective, but I do not like his cartoony style. I don’t think it fits with the tone of this story, I don’t think it’s suitable for a Conan story, and it conjures awful memories of the Conan cartoon from the early 90s. I really wish Tim Truman had moved in to the penciler’s chair.
[INVISIBLE WINE GLASS]
Star Wars: Darth Vader and the Lost Command 1 was purchased with absolutely no forethought — my childlike brain still responds to that iconic logo with a primal “gimme it.” Speaking of “fill-in-every-gap-syndrome,” Haden Blackman and Rick Leonardi’s story involves a young Darth Vader trying to figure out exactly where he fits in the Imperial power structure, and how he fits in Emperor Palpatine’s plans. Take if from me, a huge Star Wars fan from way back when — I don’t care. Darth Vader is not interesting as a conflicted, timorous character — he’s interesting as a malignant force. That said, Blackman’s script features a ruthless and bloodthirsty Vader, one who has secret day dreams about his dead wife, but who smothers those thoughts with immediate violence. The story feels a little skimpy (nine full pages are given over to showing the Imperial forces taking a backwater city on a backwater planet, which is probably overkill), but Rick Leonardi is good at action so at least it looks nice. Honestly, I could go either way on this one. I love the classic Star Wars characters, but it’s not like there’s a lot here to obsess over.
[NO, SHAZAM, YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO EAT LIGHTNING AND CRAP THUNDER]
I’ve been enjoying the DC Kids version of Shazam, so when I saw Shazam 1 on the racks I thought I’d give it a go. Shazam is not a character with whom I’m well-versed, but I know the basics. Eric Wallace and Cliff Richards seem to be doing your standard update ‘n’ reboot for a modern age, which is, you know, a plan. Of sorts. Billy and Mary Batson still seem to be orphans but have lost their Shazam powers, while Freddy Freeman, with whom I’m unfamiliar, retains his powers (and has a terrible high school haircut). Some demonic villainess named Blaze comes to steal Freddy’s power, the two fight, Mary does a little work in a soup kitchen, Freddy impales Blaze on a statue and then “Shazams” her back to hell — lots happens, but what does it mean? I dunno. I assumed this was just “first issue roughness,” but this is apparently a one-shot according to DC’s solicitation. Funny how it doesn’t say that anywhere on the cover; that monthlong branding initiative is already reaping dividends. Anyway, if Freddy can send her to hell with his powers, why didn’t he do that right away instead of letting her wreck the city? I’m also not clear on how old Billy and Mary are supposed to be — they seem a bit young to have their own apartment. I didn’t hate this, but it’s nowhere near as concise and fun as the DC Kids Shazam.
I know what you’re thinking: “He’s gonna give it to Fantastic Four, because at least the Thing didn’t die.” That’s not a bad think there, but I did read a new comic that was better than all this stuff. Fat Guy on Couch: Losing Control, from See You Next Wednesday Comics, is an eight-page mini comic written and drawn by Star Clipper’s own Mike Harvey. Mike plans to do one mini a week for the entirety of 2011, and this is the fourth issue. They’re non-serial, black & white comics about whatever Mike wants to write and illustrated in Mike’s idiosyncratic style; There’s a hint of anime in the Harvey page, more than a dash of classic 8-bit Nintendo character design and a little bit of the “do it fast and hard” style that typified the underground comics of the ’70s and that runs counter to everything in current mainstream comics — that’s a point in its favor.
[A REPRESENTATIONAL PANEL FROM MIKE’S ONGOING KNUCKLEBUSTER COMIC]
Obviously, the publishing schedule means he’s streamlining some things (backgrounds are sparse), but that’s good for an artist’s development. He’s gonna learn some new tricks and probably some things he didn’t know he could do in order to stick to his schedule; it’ll be interesting to see how Mike’s style mutates and adapts over the course of this year. But the books stand on their own as single issues, because there’s something pure and engaging in the union of his drawing style and his goofy stories that works very well. The titular Fat Guy in this week’s comic drops his remote control and exerts a Herculean effort to recover it without ever getting off his sofa — he’s the hardest-working lazy man you’ll see. There also may be one (or more) fart jokes in this issue. What can I say? I laughed. Mike’s personality has come through in every issue so far, and that’s something a lot of highly-paid professional comic creators have never been able to do. See You Next Wednesday Comics is the best thing I read this week — and it’s probably gonna be in the running for the next 48 weeks, as well.
If you are planning to read Fantastic Four 587: Black Bag but have not done so, the following is a *SPOILER* rich environment. I mean it — *SPOILERS* abound beyond the next paragraph. I guarantee if you have not read the issue yet, you will regret reading any further because there’s at least one huge *SPOILER* coming, namely, who dies in this issue. You have been amply warned about the upcoming *SPOILERS* concerning Fantastic Four 587, which features the DEATH OF A MEMBER OF THE FANTASTIC FOUR.
Last warning.* SPOILERS*.
[DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?]
Johnny Storm is “dead.” I wish I could say that I’m shocked and amazed, but I can’t Am I happy Ben Grimm doesn’t die? You bet your rocky orange butt I am. And am I pleased with Johnny Storm, the Human Torch, being the one who gets the ax? Yeah, he’s the one member I could care less about.
[WE ARE RICHER FOR HAVING LOST HIM]
And that’s the problem with this, the first big death of 2011. I should feel something, shouldn’t I? I should care a little bit that he’s gone.
Hickman has been juggling four separate storylines for the past couple issues. Reed’s on the other side of the universe, Sue’s underwater and Johnny and the un-Thinged Ben Grimm are in the Baxter Building. Hickman has to rotate the story to a new location every other page, keeping everybody’s plot in motion; this also helps to obscure who might be the one who dies, as all of them are in peril. But it also undercuts the drama, as everybody’s individual peril is given short shrift — Hickman doesn’t stick with any one scene for too long, so the story has a very hurried, scattershot feel. When Johnny makes his decision to stay behind and sacrifice himself to close the gate to the Negative Zone, it happens so quickly that I felt cheated. A few issues back Future Val and Future Franklin reminisced about their favorite superheroes, and Franklin’s love for his uncle is clear in the quick answer he gives his sister that the Human Torch has always been his favorite. And yet Franklin and Johnny say nothing to one another in their final moments, not even goodbye, or “see ya” or one last hug — not even a look back at each other. Both of them — heck, all the kids — react with. I stopped that sentence because they don’t react anyway at all. There’s nothing there — none of the kids seem to care that Uncle Johnny’s gonna get snuffed in the next 45 seconds. That feels false, and that is bad storytelling.
Hickman and Epting do give us a nice scene between Johnny and Ben in those final moments, and Johnny gets to flash his famous bravado one last time, but it sure doesn’t feel like this is the absolute last time. Val assures Johnny that “dad built a backdoor” and says “we’ll be back,” and then he’s buried under a horde of giant other-dimensional insects. But it’s not like we see his dismembered body or anything definitive that tells us — with utter certainty — that Johnny Storm is dead.
I know this is comics and nobody stays dead for long anymore, despite what Hickman has been saying about this storyline being for real. Hickman has rekindled my interest in this book and these characters during the past year, to the point that I ran into the shop today four minutes after opening to buy this issue. I wanted read this issue and feel relief, or anger or outrage or, most of all, a sense of magnificent heroism as one of the World’s Greatest Heroes proved that they were willing to lay down their life for everything right and good. I wanted to be amazed. I wasn’t.
There are elements of the issue that I like: Sue flexes muscles she hasn’t shown in many years, and that’s rad. Ben shows us once again his huge heart. Franklin displays an ominous powerlust when using his powers. These are all promising sign posts for future issues. But this issue was supposed to have been something more. I feel stupid for falling for the hype, and I feel disappointed by a writer who hasn’t done that to me before (ignoring his S.H.I.E.L.D. comic, because I’m not reading it).
And I’m most disappointed by the transparency of the fact that Johnny Storm is no more dead and gone than Steve Rogers was last year. This is just another temporary and ultimately meaningless death. It won’t be the last. And that, sadly, is the only certainty about death in the comics these days. Characters will die, but they’ll come back, and none of it means anything except for the marketing team who gets to run the hype machine on overdrive for a few months.
This week I’m starting a compendium of my favorite Image series, the kind of series that have effectively redefined the way I view Image as a publisher, so I thought what better way to start it off than to talk about Eisner Award winner and one of my all time favorite comics, Chew.
Chew is the creation of writer John Layman and artist Rob Guillory and focuses on the life of a guy named Tony Chu (obvious word play, I know). By all accounts, Tony Chu is a pretty average guy. He works hard as a member of the police force, he has a brother that he barely gets along with, and he gets psychic impressions off anything he puts in his mouth. Okay, maybe he’s not the most average guy, but living in a world where chicken can only be bought on the black market and the FDA is the most powerful government agency in the world, he’s about as average as people get.
Now aside from the hilariously bizarre premise, there’s a lot to like about Chew. First off, Chew is one of the few stories that doesn’t settle for being in one genre, but rather comfortably fits in at least three. If I had to describe it, Chew is a mixture of comedy and mystery with a healthy dose of science fiction. These qualities are brought into even sharper focus by Rob Guillory’s gritty, yet cartoonish art style, which will make you want to laugh one moment and feel a little nauseous the next. It’s an interesting state of mind, let me tell you.
[Not the words I was thinking of.]
The third quality that makes Chew worth it is of course the solid plot. From the very first installment you know there’s something larger going on in the story than you can see. There’s a history behind Tony Chu and his strange abilities, as well as a connection between the outlaw of chicken and the deaths of millions of people as the result of a mysterious “avian flu.” Tony as well as a growing cast of characters with equally bizarre food-related abilities are in the thick of it, or at least that’s what Layman’s been hinting at.
Currently Chew is on issue sixteen of a projected sixty issue run, and I for one plan on being there for every second of it. Whether you’re new to comics or just looking for something off the beaten path, this is definitely the series to try.
For the longest time I had a slight prejudice against anything produced by Image Comics. It wasn’t because of any particular creator, character or event, but mainly because most Image creations seemed the same to me, or at least they weren’t too different than most of the other comic creations out there. True, they tended to dwell on a darker breed of superhero with more muscles and less realistic proportions, but they were still your typical superhero stories. Battles were fought, villains defeated, and the status quo maintained, nothing Marvel and DC didn’t do or didn’t do better.
[If Marvel and DC took steroids, I imagine their characters would look something like this.]
This has always been a source of confusion to me, because ever since Image Comics was established in the early 90’s, it set itself up so it could be different than the Big Two. It was founded by a group of artists (mostly from Marvel), who had grown tired of having no creative control or ownership over what they were making, and so decided to band together to make a publishing company where they could do things their way and on their terms. This group included big names like Todd McFarlane, Marc Silvestri, Erik Larsen, Jim Lee, and Rob Liefeld. Image was the first major creator-owned publisher, but since most of these guys were artists and not writers, the only thing that they really did differently was their character designs. Image became big on muscles, guts, and blood and small on plot development and dialogue. In some cases, both then and now, the comics these guys created seemed to be derived from other characters they had worked on in the past. In the end the result was that in the family feud between Marvel and DC, Image became the deformed step-child that no one wanted to talk about.
[Come on, Todd McFarlane. You don’t work for Marvel anymore, so stop drawing Spider-man.]
In recent years, however, there has been a growing trend in Image which has slowly garnered more and more of my attention. I’m not sure whether it’s because their superhero titles began to dip in popularity or if it was because their target audience was maturing and looking for something new, but Image has been branching out. This emergent breed of graphic fiction is unlike any of its predecessors: original, plot-based, and of genres that don’t involve tights and capes.
True, other publishers have fought in this arena before, including Vertigo, Oni Press, and other smaller publishers, but for Image this is huge. In my opinion, this is a step that they should have taken from the very beginning, and now that they have I feel like I should give them the applause they deserve for delivering to us series like Chew, Proof, and countless others.
If you like superheroes, awesome; read Planet Hulk, check out Blackest Night, or even take a trip into the past and browse through the Age of Apocalypse. If you’re looking for something different, come to the store and ask for a good Image book. I promise you won’t be disappointed.
Next week I’m going to start a countdown of my favorite Image titles (man, it feels weird saying that), but until then, happy readings.
Guys, guys, guys. I don’t want to jinx anything, but it looks like Ben Grimm ain’t goin’ out of the Fantastic Four Deathbag feet-first. Observe closely this promotional image for “Fear Itself,” Marvel’s next dumb “extinction level event:”
[HELLO, HANDSOME]
Do you see who’s hiding in plain sight in the middle of that pack?
Put on your tinfoil hat and join me in my impregnable bunker of deep thoughts while I unravel the two (maybe two and a half) implications of this image.
First, this means my beloved Thing (that sounds much cruder on second reading) lives through Jonathan Hickman’s “Three” story arc, right? There he is, hale and hearty amongst other living superheroes; the big lug’s gonna come out of this just fine. Unless Marvel’s planning to pull one of those “the events in this issue take place immediately before those of Fantastic Four Deathbag” deals with Fear Itself, which even I have a hard time believing Marvel is dumb enough to do. (Aren’t they? This theory may be falling apart before it even gets off the ground.)
But no, Tom Brevoort claims in an interview in this week’s Comic Shop News that Fear Itself was set up in the comics about a year and a half to two years ago, implying that this is a meticulously planned event that will fit in seamlessly with Marvel Universe continuity. So, this image was approved with the Thing in it because the Thing is still alive when the series begins in March. Someone dies in the January’s FF, ergo, Benjy’s not gonna die.
Benjy’s not gonna die.
BENJY’S NOT GONNA DIE!
[HOW CAN IT NOT BE BUTTER?]
OK, the second implication of this image is that Marvel had carefully considered who to place in this promotional image, and decided to throw the Thing in there as a red herring. Knowing that it would hit the internet a week or so before the Deathbag, the editors are doing it to get our hopes up concerning Mr. Grimm. This particular image will actually be some sort of flashback in Fear Itself to a time when Thing was still alive, perhaps a callback to the event Brevoort claims were inserted in the comics 18 to 24 months ago. It’s a total dick move, sure, so it’s less likely than the first implication, isn’t it? Marvel wouldn’t treat its readership so callously, would it?
(Considers the proliferation of X-Books, polybag fever, the recent cancellation of Thor the Mighty Avenger, the trashing and jumpstarting of the core books in the mid-90s, Cable, Civil War’s shipping delays, the current Ant-Man, the 2-year gap in Ultimate Hulk ‘n’ Wolverine, their contentious relationship with Jack Kirby in the 70s, the $24.99 price point for softcover trades featuring 8 issues of reprints, another massive and massively useless extinction-level crossover, fake deaths, death do-overs, deaths of everyone, Deadpool and this abomination:
The post-holiday doldrums are over. At least comics-wise they are; my own doldrums continue unabated. I was seven hours late to work today, and I’m blaming an almost lethal malaise for that.
I did buy quite a few comics, however, and that almost always cheers me up. I have too many to review here (because I’m long-winded), and some of them were so good I’d really like to dig into why they’re so enjoyable (and I’m long-winded). Allow me to inhale deeply, and then we’ll get to it.
[LEGION, LEVITZ, LOVING IT]
Legion of Super-Heroes 9 is a book I recently started reading after years of ignoring it. The main reason I finally picked it up is Paul Levitz, who returned to scripting the book after toiling for years as DC’s publisher. I really like Levitz as a writer, and despite having very limited familiarity with any of the Legionnaires, I find the book compelling. This is largely due to Levitz’s skill with characterization, but his ability to cram a lot of words into every issue also appeals to me (go figure). Levitz’s stories are extra-dense, rife with characters and side plots and little scenes that maybe don’t relate to the main arc right now, but seem to be setting up something down the line. The current story involves the Legion trying to prevent the shape changing Durlan race from killing more United Planet officials in a misguided attempt at vengeance. I’m fuzzy on why this is important, but I’m enjoying the story. Yildiray Cinar and Wayne Faucher’s art enhances the experience, as the pair have a super-clean style that’s reminiscent of a more dynamic Silver Age aesthetic.
[PLEASE USE PROTECTIVE EYEWEAR WHEN FIGHTING CRIME]
Amazing Spider-Man 652 is another story-heavy type of comic. Let me count the ways I love Dan Slott this week.
1. Spider Slayer has created an army of insectoid villains from people who were adversely affected by J. Jonah Jameson’s days as Bugle publisher.
2. Mary Jane definitely seems to be pining for Peter Parker back in her life, and that’s as it should be.
3. Peter Parker does a fruity little disco roller skating routine that is hilariously illustrated by Stefano Caselli.
4. Pete walks into a glass door and ends up in the hospital with gauze noseplugs.
5. This:
[AUNT MAY OR MAY NOT BE CRAZY]
6. You know, I could keep doing this until the list is longer than the comic. If you have any fondness for the superhero comic as an artform and as entertainment, you should be reading Amazing Spider-Man.
[ODIN REMINISCES LIKE A CHAMP]
Thor 619 is kinda turning in to the opposite of Amazing Spider-Man. Matt Fraction’s “I’m wrecking Asgard all over again in ways no one has ever seen” storyline continues, and it’s losing steam. I say that as a Thor fan. I want this book to be awesome, and the past few months I’ve been underwhelmed. Today I actually groaned when I saw it on the racks, as if my involuntary nervous system was rebelling against buying a Thor book, and I’m genetically predisposed to buying Thor. This month, Thor has awakened Odin, who airs some grievances against his son for the way he’s been handling things in the old man’s absence, and the main gripe just so happens to be, “Why did you bring Loki back to life?” This is a gripe I had two months ago, so I’m glad Odin sees it my way. This being a Matt Fraction book, Kid Loki escapes Odin’s wrath by hopping in a conveniently-placed car and driving away — it’s neither as entertaining nor as fun as it sounds. Oh, and *SPOILER ALERT* Balder is totally eviscerated by the bad guys. I guess he’s dead now; that plot twist is so old it predates modern English. I sigh heavily and sink back into my malaise …
[I WANT TO TAKE THIS TRIP]
Ooooh, Tiny Titans 36 — malaise is gone. A rare book-length story rather than a series of vignettes, this month’s tale features Kid Devil and Hotspot cooking hot dogs by firing up their head flames, and then a journey to the center of the earth with Terra and Beast Boy where they meet a certain demon who speaks only in rhyme. Oh, and there’s also a very huggy girl Tyrannosaurus Rex in this month’s issue. Awesome? Oh, indeed it is.
[NO PREVIEW AVAILABLE, BUT THIS SCREAMS D&D TO ME]
I’ve had a steady stream of Errol Flynn movies on my Netflix lately, because they give you exactly what’s advertised. You get a handsome, witty man fighting against evil, you get a beautiful woman who’s nowhere near helpless, and you get a lot of fantastic action scenes — and often, you get an Eric Korngold score, to boot. The same could be said for IDW’s Dungeons & Dragons 3, minus the Korngold. John Rogers is writing an episodic, character driven story with lots of fight scenes, Andrea Di Vito provides beautiful visuals and beautiful women, and the whole thing is a great deal of fun under any name. Is it breaking new ground? No, not really. But it’s a solid comic that gives you exactly what the name advertises. And as I said last month, Bree Three-Hands the Halfling rogue is quickly becoming a favorite character of mine — she buckles a swash as well as Errol, and she’s as wry as Han Solo. This is good stuff.
[THIS IS FROM LAST ISSUE, BUT IT’S RAD SO IT BELONGS HERE]
Now, if you’ll excuse me a moment, it’s the time of month where I rave a bit about Northlanders. Issue #36 marks three years of Brian Woods’ viking crime stories, and I’m both amazed that it lasted this long and grateful that it has. This month’s issue finishes the two-part “The Girl In the Ice” story, and now that it’s all done, I can honestly say this is the last thing I would have considered for a viking crime story. Our titular character is a dead girl found in a frozen lake, her discoverer is an old man named Jon who is outraged by the snuffing out of a young life, and no one in the story is engaged in the heroic exploits of the sagas. What can I say? I loved it. Becky Cloonan’s art is amazing in a peculiar way — she draws a bird’s eye view of Reykjavik as a huddled knot of tents and sheds hugging the coastline that graphically demonstrates the precariousness of life in this world.
[BECKY CLOONAN AS SHE DRAWS NORTHLANDERS]
Woods uses the death of a child as a point of departure for exploring the marginalized characters of history, namely women, children and the elderly. Jon is heroic, make no mistake — he risks everything to attempt to provide a proper burial for the corpse of the young girl. Jon provides a point of view on the viking world that is contrary to everything that makes a great saga. He’s powerless and at the whim of the bloodthirsty men who run Iceland, and so we see how terrifying it would actually be to live that way. If you’re young and a man, you can pick up the axe and attempt to change the world; if you’re not, you’re seen as a potential victim. Jon knows he’s too old to be useful to the warring clans, but he’s driven by his humanity to find out who this girl was and where she belonged. It’s not a spoiler to say he finds out the answer to that enigma, but it would be a spoiler to reveal all that he learns. Months ago I wrote about Northlanders that the final issues in any arc always leave me breathless as I race to find out if the main character survives the story; I also mentioned that I’m always surprised whether they do or don’t live. This month is no exception.
For sheer delight in the art of comics, I would say Northlanders is the best thing I read this week. If you’re not into the whole viking mise en scene, I’d highly recommend Amazing Spider-Man as the best thing. If you’re looking for a great team book that provides a great deal of story for your buck, I’d point you to Legion of Super-Heroes. If you can’t find something delightful about one of these three titles, I’m not sure you actually like comic books.
With all the talk about Marvel and DC characters dying, it’s only fair to make a prediction on characters outside of the mainstream superhero universes that could/should die in 2011. The top on my hit list is Kick Ass. I loved the original comic series, but if I understand the basic premise correctly the whole point was supposed to explore what would really happen if a average kid tried to be a superhero. If you really dressed in spandex and went out on the street to fight crime you would almost certainly get your ass kicked, or worse get your ass killed. Them’s the facts. That’s why I think Mark Millar should rename the series “Ass Death,” which sums up the outcome of a dumb-ass idea like being a real life super hero: real life death. Instead, Millar continued the “Kick Ass” line with the perpetually late follow-up “Balls To The Wall” ignoring the whole threat of death for hero Dave Lizewski, as he becomes more like an indestructible superhero.
Lets review his torment and torture:
In the first issue alone Dave AKA Kick Ass was severely beaten up, stabbed and hit by a car. This should have killed him, but I suspended my disbelief for the sake that the series had seven more issues and they weren’t going to kill him in the first one. As the story continues, “Dumb Ass” again tries to stop a mugging and get’s his ass kicked again, though he is able to stop the victim from getting killed. It’s highly likely that a second fight would result in death, but Dave survives once more. Suspend that disbelief once more. Later Kick Ass is caught by the mob where they torture him by electrocuting his balls. Okay, in reality at this point the kid is dead. The mob isn’t going to electrocute your genitals and then have you stroll back to your suburban home all willy nilly. Still not dead though. Finally, after surviving all this, Dave’s high school crush that he’s befriended by pretending to be her gay friend sends him a text video of her performing oral sex on a jock that beats him up at school. Can we say “cause for teen suicide?”
Kick Ass should be dead! If they’re going to make a second series it should be marketed like ‘The Death of Superman’ from the 90s. I would loved to buy a black polybagged memorial issue with a bloody K for ‘The Death of Kick Ass.” At least it would be realistic. Yet, what will probably happen is the resurrection issue of Big Daddy and the Hit Girl teen pregnancy mini-series.
“…the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” This small phrase was initially spoken by 32nd President of the United States, Franklin D. Roosevelt, during his first inaugural address back in 1933. In reading the entirety of his address, it’s clear that this was moreso a reference to various causes behind the Great Depression, and not so much about a not-yet looming terror from the other side of the planet. (Which this phrase seems to always find itself attached too.) This March, Marvel looks to release a new 7-issue event which is entitled, “Fear Itself.” From the various interviews that I’ve seen/read, it would appear that this event’s storyline is inspired by a myriad of things both real and fictional. Things such as oil spills, bailouts, deceit, terrorism, secret Nazi missions, politics, and supposedly comics groundwork laid up to 2 years ago in advance. Also, there’s a character named the God of Fear. And Dracula.
So how does this all begin? From what is available about the series, it would appear that the catalyst stems from a mission the Red Skull initiated back in World War II and the eventual fallout that ends up wreaking havoc upon the modern Marvel age. It would appear that Steve Rogers and Namor were there to witness the mission, and so one would think that they will play a decent role in the story to come out of it. And in the case of Steve, that would be a safe bet, considering that this story may have originated as a pitch for there to be a Steve-Cap and Thor team-up, in time for both Thor and Captain America movies. What I also know, is that the Red Skull’s daughter (Sin or Synthia Schmidt) is to play a major role in the series. According to head writer, Matt Fraction (Uncanny X-Men, Invincible Ironman), Sin will be going through a sort of character transformation that will have her operating at a high tier than she currently is. Hopefully, that means she’ll become a major female villain who lacks a superpower. I think that would be a good thing.
What we can expect after the initial prologue (Pre-issue #1) issue, written by Ed Brubaker, is something that’s going to attempt the same kind of magic that Civil War created back in 2006. Even if you hated the event, you’ve got to accept a few good things in it. For one, Captain America hijacked a fighter jet then later bought the pilot a hamburger and fries after landing in a football field. Another cool thing? I’ve witnessed and have been apart of many an argument over the Registration/Anti-Registration debate. Who was right? Who was wrong? Who the hell is Speedball? Stuff like that. But also, it helped solidify my passionate dislike of Ironman. I think a lot of Marvel fans found themselves emotionally invested with Civil War, and I’d imagine that this is the plan for Fear Itself. To make the fans care again. Who doesn’t like a good crossover? I can understand not liking one if it’s a bad one. I can even understand crossover fatigue. But crossovers are pretty much what makes Marvel, Marvel. You’ve got all these heroes in one centralized area, there’s no reason why Spider-Man and Daredevil couldn’t cross paths. In fact, it really should be happening all the time. That isn’t to say that there shouldn’t be separate comics, but unlike DC comics (who spread their big heroes across various cities), Marvel pretty much had all their super eggs in one city-sized basket. Crossovers happen. They need to, if Marvel is to keep it’s “real-life, real-world” reputation.
Anyway, I’m definitely looking forward to March, so we can get the fear started in here. Also, how cool is that picture down below? Just imagine the chaos that would occur if the greatest member of the X-Men were to turn all Magneto-y. I think that’s pretty cool. And that’s it. See you later.
One of my favorite bookstores in St. Louis. Star Clipper offers not only the best selection of comic books and graphic novels in the city, but also a cornucopia of art, design and pop-culture related books and magazines. 
