Star Clipper recently installed a live-action Angry Birds shooting range in our art gallery. Since I’m constantly around Angry Birds merchandise it made me realize Angry Birds is a pretty strange game. You take birds without wings (Seemingly the reason why they’re so angry) and shoot them with a slingshot at disgruntled pigs. That’s a pretty strange premise, but it’s nothing compared to some of the bizarre games that have come out over the years. Here are my top 5 strange video games:

5. Super Noah’s Ark 3D and other Biblical video games produced by Wisdom Tree.

During Nintendo’s reign in the late 80s, early 90s, a Christian company called Wisdom Tree created unlicensed Christian video games for the NES and Super NES. If you were to go into any used video game store today, Wisdom Tree games are easy to recognize because of their light blue cartridges. Original Nintendo cartridges were all grey, with the notable exception of ‘The Legend of Zelda,’ which came in a gold cartridge. When Nintendo launched their Super Nintendo console they designed a lockout chip for the system so only officially licensed Nintendo games were playable. In order to get around this dilemma, Wisdom Tree created ‘Super Noah’s Ark 3D’, which worked kind of like the Game Genie, by plugging a licensed game into the top of the cartridge it would bypass the lockout chip.

Not only is the story of the game strange, but the gameplay is completely bizarre. Essentially, ‘Super Noah’s Ark 3D’ is an exact modified version of ‘Wolfenstein 3D,’ but with downplayed violence. ‘Wolfenstein 3D’ is notable for being the prototype for all subsequent first-person shooters. However, instead of killing Nazis like in ‘Wolfenstein 3D,’ in ‘Super Noah’s Ark 3D’ you go around with a sling shot and shoot food at sheep that are rampaging through the ark. I’ve never actually seen a physical copy of this game before, but the rumor was you could only find the cartridges at Christian book stores during it’s initial release.

Check out the game play of ‘Super Noah’s Ark 3D’ and a review of other lousy Wisdom Tree games by The Angry Nintendo Nerd:

4. Revolution X starring Aerosmith

‘Revolution X’ was a rail shooter arcade game starring Aerosmith, that was eventually ported to multiple home consoles. The story goes that in 1996 the New Order Nation or NON has banned all forms of television, music, magazines, and video games. When Aerosmith is captured by NON soldiers, it’s your mission to save the band. What weapon do you have? A gun that shoots CDs, because as the game’s slogan promotes, “Music is the weapon.” Literally. The game has a rockin’ soundtrack with classic Aerosmith tunes like ‘Walk This Way’ and ‘Love in an Elevator’ and if you beat the game and save all the band members you get to hangout with Aerosmith backstage. Score! Overall, this is one weird game. Yet, I think the strangest thing about ‘Revolution X’ is that KISS didn’t think of it first.

Here’s Joe Perry and Tom Hamilton of Aerosmith encouraging you to, “join the revolution!”

3. Seaman

This might sound weird, but I have more experience with ‘Seaman’ than of all the other games I’m writing about on my list. ‘Seaman’ was a virtual pet game for the Sega Dreamcast that came out in 2000. The unique element of the game was that it utilized the microphone on the Dreamcast’s controller so as you raised your Seaman, a fish with a human face, you could talk to it or insult it like I did with my friend Ethan all summer long back in 2000. Seaman was narrated by Leonard Nimoy and would talk back to you. The final stage of Seaman’s growth was to become a frog with a human face, but Ethan and I always got in arguments with Seaman and would boil his tank and kill him before it reached that stage. Since gaming in that era was generally a male hobby I doubt many people ever nurtured Seaman to maturity. Here is some typical gameplay:

2. Muscle March

‘Muscle March’ is my absolute favorite party game. In fact, every time I have anyone over I insist they try playing Muscle March at least once, much to my girlfriend’s dismay. Available exclusively for WiiWare download, ‘Muscle March’ is ported from an abandoned arcade game and the story is absolutely ridiculous: when an alien thief steals a group of bodybuilder’s creatine powder they chase after him by avoiding crashing through walls and tackling him.

The game is a giant stereotype that is so flamboyantly over-the-top that it is beyond offensive. In fact, it’s so ridiculous that you can’t help loving it. Undoubtedly, My favorite part is when you get a game over and your bodybuilder wistfully tosses rocks into a river.

1. Avoid The Noid and Yo! Noid

‘Avoid the Noid’ is not only one of the strangest games of all-time, it is also one of the the strangest ad campaigns of all-time. The Noid was Dominos Pizza’s Mascot in the 80s and for my money he is easily the most butt-ugly mascot ever. The strangest thing about him is that he doesn’t actually promote Dominos Pizza, he destroys it. I can’t understand why any company would want a mascot that destroys their product but apparently Dominos thought it was such a great idea they made multiple video games about him.

Many food mascots have had video games based around them, including the 7UP Spot and Cheetos’ Chester Cheetah, but the Noid was the first I can remember. ‘Avoid The Noid’ was originally released for the Commodore 64, and was later adapted for the NES as ‘Yo! Noid.’
the goal of ‘Avoid The Noid’ was pretty self-explanatory. You control a pizza delivery boy who must, well, avoid the noid because he destroys pizzas. ‘Yo! Noid’ was somewhat different because it was originally based on a japanese game called Kamen no Ninja Hanamaru. You play as the Noid and battle his evil duplicate Mr. Green using a yo-yo and a pogo stick (What is this 1955?). The reward was Dominos Pizza of course. I can only assume the goal was to beat the game in 30 minutes or less or the Noid gets your pizza for free.

Thanks for reading!

-Jon

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